Six fine bone china tea-cups

Another fun one. Choose the victims carefully; there's no fun in putting somebody's nose out of joint for the rest of the fire.

You: I am the owner of a marvellous shop, and I can sell you anything you desire. Yes, I have everything in stock in my marvellous shop. Come, let us put that to the test - I think I hear someone at the door. Yes, madam, what can I do for you?

Your partner: I would like a set of six, fine bone china tea-cups, please.

You: Ah. Now, I just sold the last set, but I can have them delivered in no time.

Partner: I will be back in just a minute.

You: Now, while we wait, I must show you some of the other things I have in stock. Toasters. I have toasters, let me show you...

(pick two members of the campfire; get them to kneel on the ground and go 'ker-chunk' and throw their hands in the air to be the toaster toasting toast. Leave them there as you carry on...)

Your partner, reappearing: Hello again, sir. Do you have my set of six, fine bone china tea-cups, please?

You: Ah. I'm sorry, they still haven't arrived, please will you wait just a little longer?

Partner: I will be back in just a minute.

(This time, get two members of the campfire to be a washing machine. Get them to show you the spin cycle... check that the toasters are still working...)

Your partner, reappearing: Hello again, sir. Do you have my set of six, fine bone china tea-cups, please?

You: Ah. I'm so, so, sorry, they still haven't arrived, but they really won't be very long now.

Partner: I will be back in just a minute.

(This time, the two you pick could be microwave ovens (arms going round as a turntable, then ping). Keep the toasters and washing machines going...)

Your partner, reappearing: Hello again, sir. Do you have my set of six, fine bone china tea-cups, please?

You: Ah. I'm so, so, sorry, they still haven't arrived. But ...

(with a sweeping gesture towards the six people knelt on the floor pretending to be toasters, washers and microwaves...)

... maybe I can suggest a substitution? I do have this lovely set of six mugs...

Don't forget to thank your 'mugs' as you let them go back to their places round the fire.

Everywhere we go...

Not quite as nice as 'Boomalacka', because it isn't as good at a mixed campfire, but this is another good loud one. Obviously, replace the Forestdale Cub Scouts reference with your own group name. Its weakness is that it forces you to simply build the volume.

Everywhere we go,    (echo)
People always ask us,    (echo)
Who we are,    (echo)
Where we come from,    (echo)
So we tell them,    (echo)
We're the Forestdale Cub Scouts,    (echo)
The mighty, mighty, Forestdale,    (echo)
And if they don't hear us,    (echo)
We shout a little louder...    (echo)

Once you've got the loudest you can, the last verse ends with

And if they don't hear us,    (echo)
They must be deaf.    (echo)

Boomalacka!

In the middle of any campfire, there is a time when you want to let everyone know who you are. This is a nice yell with a space in the last line for you to identify yourselves; I've put in one of my old (and sadly, expired) groups. When there are a couple of groups round the fire, this can be led with yells alternately by leaders from each group. If you do that, however, it's good to have a 'joint' verse at the end to bring everyone together again.

Boomalacka, Boomalacka,
Bow wow wow,
Chingalacka, Chingalacka,
Chow chow chow,
Boomalacka, Chingalacka,
Who are we?
Forestdale Cub Scouts, can't you see?

In the 'joint' chant, something like 'We're all Cub Scouts, can't you see?' or 'Beckenham District, can't you see?' does the job very nicely.

You'll never go to heaven

'Oh you'll never go to heaven' is a real campfire classic. Personally, not my favourite, but everyone else seems to enjoy it. Try to make sure a couple of your audience are up for adding verses, it is more fun when the words are coming from round the circle.

There is a 'proper' start to it, though I usually just go into the verses. The four lines are sung as a call and response, then the whole verse is sung through followed by the chorus. 

The Preacher when down.....  (echo)
To the church one day.....  (echo)
And he got on his knees....  (echo)
And he started to pray....  (echo)

Repeat the verse as a single singthrough...

The Preacher when down to the church one day, and he got on his knees and he started to pray.

And then we get the chorus...

I ain't gonna grieve My Lord, 
I ain't gonna grieve My Lord, 
I ain't gonna grieve My Lord, 
I ain't gonna grieve, My Lord no more.


He asked the Angels...   (echo)
For some advice....   (echo)
How do I get to Heaven...   (echo)
This was their reply...   (echo)

Repeat the verse, sing the chorus.

Oh you'll never go to Heaven / In a baked bean tin / 'Cos a baked bean tin's / Got baked beans it.

I'm sure you get it by now...

Oh you'll never go to Heaven / In Akela's car / 'Cos Akela's car / Won't go that far.

Oh you'll never go to Heaven / With a fat Girl Guide / 'Cos the pearly gates / Aren't built that wide.

Oh you'll never go to Heaven / In a bottle of gin / 'Cos the Lord won't let / No spirits in.

Oh you'll never go to Heaven / On a piece of glass / 'Cos a piece of glass / Might cut your elbow.

Oh you'll never go to Heaven / In a Jumbo Jet / 'Cos the Lord ain't got / No runways yet.

And so on, seemingly for ever. Make up your own verses, they will either work and come back in future camps or be lost in the fire... either way, good luck!

Blue Jay

This song is a useful one to have tucked away in your head - easy words, and call and response songs are always a fallback if the fire don't know many words themselves.

Down in the meadow not so very far off,    (echo)
Blue Jay died of the whooping cough,    (echo)
He whooped so hard with the whooping cough,    (echo)
He whooped his head and his tail right off.    (echo)

Remember that you don't need to just use volume - changes to the timing and higher and lower pitched verses make it more interesting for everyone, and that saves your voice a bit as well.